The Mediator
The Mediator
Mediators excel in empathy, interpersonal skills, and communication, but may struggle with over responsibility for others’
happiness and a pattern of taking things personally.
They tend towards an anxious attachment style, with a “deactivated” stress response, meaning they’re more likely to
over-compromise in the name of quickly restoring peace.
To grow, Mediators can work on internalizing love and security, increasing
their capacity for solitude, and developing healthy boundaries.
NERVOUS SYSTEM
DEACTIVATED
ATTACHMENT SYSTEM
ANXIOUS
ATTENTIONAL SYSTEM
GRASPING
STRENGTHS
Strong Interpersonal Skills:
Mediators excel in caring deeply for people and showing genuine empathy. They are
naturally attuned to the emotions and needs of others.
Empathy and Compassion:
They are exceptionally skilled in social interactions, often being seen as charming,
charismatic, and well-liked by a wide range of people.
Community Leadership:
Mediators make excellent community leaders. They have the ability to bring people
together, foster collaboration, and create a sense of unity and purpose.
Articulate and Expressive:
They possess strong communication skills and are adept at expressing themselves
effectively. Their articulateness allows them to convey ideas and emotions with clarity.
Conflict Resolution:
Mediators have a knack for diffusing conflicts and mediating disputes. They
often play a vital role in resolving disagreements within their social circles.
TRIGGER CHALLENGES
Over-Responsibility for Others' Happiness:
Mediators tend to feel overly responsible for someone else’s happiness and may take on unnecessary emotional burdens.
Taking Things Personally:
They often interpret situations as personal criticisms, even when they are not. They have a propensity to internalize external events.
Persistent Worry:
Triggered Mediators frequently worry that they have done something wrong or caused the trigger, leading to persistent self-doubt and anxiety.
Insistence on Communication:
They may insist on discussing the issue repeatedly, even if it results in going in circles, as they seek clarification and resolution.
Lack of Emotional Space:
Mediators struggle to take space or distance themselves from the trigger, even when it would be beneficial to cool down and gain perspective.
Tendency to Catastrophize:
There is a tendency to magnify problems and imagine worst-case scenarios, leading to increased stress and anxiety.
MEDIATOR GROWTH GOAL:
Strengthen their self-sufficiency, expanding their capacity to spend time
alone, hold boundaries, and take the necessary space for lasting resolution.
PATHWAYS FOR GROWTH
Internalizing Love and Security: 
Mediators thrive when they learn how to internalize feelings of love and security, fostering self-reliance and comfort with being alone.
Increased Capacity for Solitude: 
Increasing their ability to find happiness and contentment in solitude reduces the need for immediate repair or reassurance from others, allowing them to stand up for their needs.
Creating and Holding Healthy Boundaries: 
Developing the ability to clearly and confidently establish and maintain healthy boundaries is vital for Mediators to protect their well-being.
Techniques to Explore:
Inner Child Work:
Exploring and healing the inner child can be instrumental in addressing past wounds and fostering self-love and security.
Boundary Work:
Delving into boundary-setting techniques helps Mediators define their personal limits and communicate them effectively.
Developing Assertiveness:
Learning to ask for their needs to be met is crucial for balanced and fulfilling relationships.
NEXT EVOLUTION OF THE MEDIATOR:
The Mentor
The Mediator’s natural evolution, the Mentor, has the empathy and emotional attunement of the Mediator, but with increased self-mastery that takes a stand for healthy, correct relationships (even when it upsets others!).
This evolution happens once the Mediator cultivates a stronger, independent core that can hold boundaries, express their needs, and feel safe without external assurance.
FREE MEDITATIONS FOR MEDIATORS
TOTAL MORNING ACTIVATION
A daily morning practice designed to bolster Mediator’s
resolve, optimism, and courage. An excellent way to set state for the day.
Trigger to Tranquil: Deactivated
Recover quickly from any shut down state. When triggered, use this nervous system training to re-regulate your system back to a connected, centered state.
LISTEN TO YOUR MEDITATIONS ON THE TOOLBOX APP FOR FREE
And get access to Rick William’s free 7 Day Challenge, plus all the other Toolbox Trainings.
